Oooh you're a naughty mess

well it seems no one reads this blog, bar the occasional random visitor, an instance or two of whom have left concerned comments/ well, thanks for your concern/ it's appreciated/ however nothing but chemical purging and replacing or perhaps restructuring can help me (my poor tortured self/ my horrible monstrous self (the monster inside))/ i've always had it, but it's become a lot stronger as i've got older/ it's reassuring to try and explain this monster, to break it down and explain it as a name for a composite of various different chemical imbalances/ but that cannot be the whole story/ the gut the gut if man were nothing but the gut/ heroin is the only thing which helps and so soon i'm going to get lots/ i was going to join the gym again and become an even greater slave to my vanity, tickled by the empty flirting and flashing eyes of passing women, but no/ i'd rather soothe out and sleep/