f'n' a-K (tow it, ace)/ bin oot with me cousin 'n' purchased some real shit: deer hunter, taxi driver, 3 colours blue, heathers, enter the dragon and on cassette scetches of spain, miles davis/ nucking fice, blinnid?/ i suppose/ ekootin papa don't take no mess, james brown/ drinking high comissioner whiskey (cheep 'n' guurd!)/ alba out wit familias this after so i ont skotch and philumz, y'ken?/ i think eye does/ have rediscovered my love of diarising and have developed a fetish for notebooks, pens and pencils/ if something means that much to one the tools by which one achieves 'it' acquire a phantastikal significance/ anyway, plz leave comments if you agree/ disagree/ feel indifferent about or indeed have any other feeling or none about my views or tastes and perhaps we could begin a mutually benificial dialogue/ otherwise it can feel like throwing words into space...

hum-muh-mur...pished styll from last n'g't/ consisted in a now medium-rare visit t'spot where conzmd much blanc 'n' the-colour-a-common-alternative-to-blonk-envelopez (ah-kuh cheval) 'n' opposite of droit f'n' matt stone, no the first name of parker happy/ krumbz, quwot a mowph-phuw, nah min?/prapz... da bowzer iz within fine form tho' sooooooooo aktiv...we shall see (or a ver) how we possess on/ luv 'n' respek peepz...

do we
all of us enjoy the
now or do we posit other better
days

i know
i
do the latter

i live in the
past, be it good or bad and in the
future, again good or
bad

often one is encouraged to
seize the day. perhaps then
living in the present is uncommon.
people maybe don't

so why? why is this a common
phenomenon? what is
tricky about living
now?

living
now doesn't necessarily mean
recklessly

living
now doesn't necessarily mean
impulsively

it
means
living without
fear

it
means
living without
pointless speculation

it
means
really
living

this
takes
guts but
why not?

why be
ruled
by
fear?

because it is what
most are accustomed
to

so beat
programming with
probability

when
i've thought
this bad thing would
happen it
didn't

this has happened
countless
times

so what
reason has one to
speculate, other than
commonsensically

leave
shit by the
path and walk
on...

not f'n' trop mal/ stomach a trice left of for reasons unbeknownst but other than fine/ putting off work putting it off tho' i don't know why/ i need to become more responsible in my working habits as 'm trying to become in my drinking/ oh well.../ off out tonight to fratenise with some old courier mates/ the alba claims she'll be fine alone with the dane of greatness/ i just took him out for a shit and was again struck by the sheer scale of the beast/ phenomenal...

f'n' ace/ 1 beer yester, none today/ we're dog sitting again, this time a great dane who, at 5 months, is the size of a fucking pony/ his name is francis and he has an impefection in his left iris, which is bright pale blue/ stunning/ best is he's so chilled, although walking him is something of a chore/ this one we've for 5 weeks more or less/ it's quite bizzare 'cause albrecht an' i've been toying with the idea of bowser ownership for some time and, in the space of a few weeks we've been left in charge of 2/ breed wise g't d'n's are near perfect/ they eat the same amount as any other dog, do not crave attention and are complete pacifists (unlike the staff. we looked after)/ they also look (this one in particular) extremely impressive/ so yeah, greta the dane (or frankie)...

f'n' tray bee-an/ jus' r't'rn'd fr'm shop with fresh baguette, mozzarella and bacon/ sipping twinnings' intense blend/ en-r't'rn fr'm our brief retreat to countryside felt gr't for four days without b'z/ went straight to pub with alba and bro for pints twain of old speckled hen and then at home celebrated b'day in true style with a 1/5 of good whiskey, 6 beers and some weed/ bought a huge selection of chinese food and so we ate and watched videos (i know...since dvd has taken over charity shops sell 5 videos (oft in perfect condition) for pounds sterling 1/ thus far i've get carter, a short film on murder, american history x, american werewolf in london, alien, aliens dir. cut, some like it hot, the breakfast club, et more)/ i also went to my favourite secondhand b'k st'r' and acquired 7 classics (mostly dh and de mass.) in perfect condition for pounds 9/ thus i've a glutting ahead/ bon voyage p'pl'...

yeah shit, now 29 yrs'de and doing okay/ 4 days in idyllic surroundings drying out(ish) and eating well/ got a gig on 25th, actually being paid money to play blues/ 've compiled an extensive play list tho''ll've to take out some of the more obscure stuff/ i have mellowed and thus no longer wish to deliberately patronise and thus alienate most of my audience/ the flipside is the complete adoration of the few who get it, but i guess i'm more secure than i used to be/ moreover was going to score a whole bunch of heroin on my b'day and instead had a meal with some ppl and a cpl b'rs and a cpl spliffs/ que l'phuk?/ je kendown to 25mls methadone and my bones hurt like fuckery/ will persevere however as i'm sick of the green angel/ listening one good man, janis joplin/ hm, drinking polish bier, beir, beer, bee-ar, what-ev-ahh, and taking it E-ahy-Z, moyne/

f'n' g'd/ sp'nt all day yester in bed, rising at 2134 to acquire pizza and apple juice/ sat up till 0000 while tha abla did her hair (we're going on holiday 2jur) and had a cpl light vod.s b-iv bed ag'in/ rose at 0625 this morn. to gauze-like mist and clarified gold morning light/ nice/ currently sippin' cafe schwartz and listening to mahzak...will write upon my return from the suffolk countryside in iii days...