Oooh you're a naughty mess

have quit drinking again/ intake de yester: 2 of each of my usuals/ thus slept about an hour/ up obscenely early and hearing sounds i remember from my insomniac past/ i have to quit drinking this time/ my previously excellent blood pressure has rocketed to near heart attack territory/ doc say if it don't improve v soon then i must take tablets (beta blockers) or worse hospital, dependent on tox. levels in my liver created by alcohol and methadone/ all possible scenarios are pretty horrific but still only possible/ one certainty however is that if i carry on no ddu will prescribe me methadone and i know the pain of withdrawal/ the pain of withdrawal from 3 years sustained high dose methadone i cannot even contemplate/ and thus came the jolt i've been praying for/ mercy...